12 Strategies to Help Relieve Teen Stress
Photo by Liza Summer
Now that you understand the impact of stress on your teens and you spot stress symptoms, this is an opportunity to guide them through their difficult times. As a parent, you might feel at a loss about how to help.
These strategies can help your adolescent's stress (and yours!):
1. Schedule time with your teen. Even though you may do activities together as a family, you can further help your teen by establishing a time to talk to focus on them. This is the time to ask questions like, "What's going on in your world these days?" Teens do not typically answer with abundant information, yet the point is to have time with each other to allow information to flow. Have a weekly set day and time for this focused time and add some activity like a walk or shopping together as this is more likely to feel less forced to "talk." Even if not much information is shared each week, your teen still appreciates the quality time that’s set aside for them.
2. Adjust teens’ school and activities schedule. A parent must ensure that your adolescent's schedule isn't too cramped or exhausting. If they're overwhelmed, you may need to help them eliminate some of their activities. If your teen is showing stress signs around time to get things done or lack of time to have fun, reevaluate their schedule and remove one or more activities. Try to help arrange some downtime to hang out with friends.
3. Listen and learn more about interests. We may or may not like the same music or content as our teens, yet it's good to know what your teens are interested in and their likes and dislikes. Try to appreciate what they have interests in. It's surprising how much this appreciation can contribute to releasing stress. Teens assume parents dislike everything they like, so when you show appreciation for their interests, they can release some tension overall.
4. Show respect, concern, and understanding of the stressful times in their life. "Hey, I see that you're upset about something” or "It looks like your Chemistry class is getting pretty tough. Is there anything I can do to help?" In addition to the words offering concern or assistance, they will release stress knowing that you care about their stressful times.
5. Provide uplifting praise or feedback. A simple "Thanks for loading the dishwasher." "That shirt looks great on you." "I appreciate your reading a bedtime story to your little sister last night." On a tough day for your teen, positive comments and praise can help them get through the stress.
6. Engage in regular physical exercise. One of the best strategies for stress management is taking part in some strenuous or stress-releasing exercise. Riding bikes together or taking a yoga class can help melt stress away. This could be tied in with strategy #1.
7. Model effective communication in the home. Use simple language to say how you feel. For example, "I felt upset when XYZ happened." Ask the other person involved how they think and listen respectfully. Look at options of how best to proceed and agree on how to proceed. When your teen is involved in communicating a solution, it will be much more impactful and less stressful.
8. Teach to analyze a situation. Questions like, "What do you think happened?" "What do you think would be some ways you could resolve this?" "Do you 'own' this issue, or does it belong to someone else?". This can help your teen realize that stresses in life are not absolute, and they can be resolved or released as a burden. Analyzing situations together also supports strategy #7.
9. Help them to stop catastrophizing. Your teen might say, "I couldn't believe how hard that math test was! I know I got an F on it. I'll probably flunk the whole course and not get accepted into college because of one dumb exam!" Acknowledge that the test was hard, and mention that perhaps there are better ways to prepare for other such tests in the future. Let them know that they've just shared the worst-case scenario. Ask them to describe the best-case scenario. Reassure your teen that regardless of the outcome of this one test, it’s the action of preparation and effort put forth that makes the difference in life way beyond one test.
10. Laugh together. Laughter is a healing elixir for stress. Share a joke or a funny story or watch an appropriate comedian or sitcom together. When you model a fun-loving attitude, your teen will feel comfortable to have a similar attitude.
11. Consider helpful studying and relaxation techniques such as Lofi music, deep breathing, and meditation. Experimenting with different mind and body techniques together can be fun and helpful at the same time.
12. Instill confidence. Parents hold an extraordinary place in their adolescent children's lives, even if it doesn't appear that way. Remind them that acknowledging their stressful feelings is powerful. Working through stress takes practice and gives them the experience to address stress in the future. Share a memory of a time in their life when they had stress and overcame it. Perhaps share a time when you overcame stress in your life. Learning skills to adapt to stress will build their confidence.
If you consistently apply these strategies and your adolescent continues to be stressed out, consider seeking a therapist or mental health professional to work directly with you and your teen.
Whether you’re a parent, relative, or friend supporting a positive influence in an adolescent’s life - kudos to you for your efforts!